I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
