yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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