How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
