I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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