I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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