It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
His nipple licking is glorious
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