i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
So much Jack, so little girl.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
