If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Boobs speak an international language.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
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