never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize