So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize