Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
