You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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