remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Congratulations! We have a period
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
