you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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