Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
You took a bar mat shot.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize