i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
