Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
