I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
i drank out of a bidet.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
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