I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
