I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
