He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
