I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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