I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
i think im in europe. pls send help
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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