Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Randomize
