so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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