i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
