If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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