I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
