why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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