Sponge bath it is.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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