It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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