dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
