im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize