I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
