just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
