May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize
