And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
