Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
