Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
