Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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