I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
