He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
