My room smells like vodka and shame
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
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