Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
