I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
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