But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
ttyl tear gas
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
