you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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