YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
