you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
