According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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